Your unique view of what success means to you is the precise reason why you need to give up your desire to make others happy.
Sometimes you have to be a little selfish. Sometimes you have to put your needs first. This is not a bad thing; it is common sense. Understand and accept this truth and you can overcome your fear of failing. If you never fail, it means you never try. And if you never try, you will never succeed. Your fear of failure has many roots, one of which is the desire to please others mentioned above. Nothing could be further from the truth, however.
People love a trier; a person who is willing to put their neck on the line in order to chase their dreams.
On the one hand, the desire to improve upon yourself and hone your talents is one that we should act upon. On the other, a need to be perfect in every area of your life is one that is more likely to hold you back. It boils down to what is important and what is not; where aiming for perfection is a help, and where it is a hindrance. If you want to be a world-class ballerina, then practicing every step and hold is worth the effort. But seeking to have an immaculately kept home, perfectly worded emails, and a flawless grasp of every subject matter known to man is a waste of your mental and physical resources.
Sometimes, just good enough is all we can hope for.
Something that ties in very closely with the limiting beliefs we talked about earlier is the self-doubt that many of us carry around inside our heads. Not only does this doubt form the basis of those mental limits, it prevents us from acting on our intuition, our drive, and our desire.
But when I wanted to start my own company, to share my knowledge about motivational psychology and training with others, it wasn't as easy. How to Become a Confident Person and Succeed in Life. The moment you turn feeling sorry for yourself into your life story is the moment you.
Self-doubt is a ball and chain around our ankle, stopping us from moving forward at any great speed. Remove this from the equation and suddenly you will find a momentum that propels you towards greater things than you have ever thought possible. Most of us have to put in the hours to create the success for ourselves, and this can be difficult if you are impatient by nature. Instead, try to see your success not as an end point, but as a journey to be enjoyed. If it helps, set lots of smaller goals to act as waypoints so that you have something to celebrate on a more regular basis.
Just, please, be patient and remember that good things come to those who wait, and who work hard for it. Surrender Your Control The earth keeps spinning and the world keeps running without any input from you — remember that. Control is very often an illusion that we are happy to go along with because it comforts us and reduces our anxiety.
The reality is that things happen around us and to us that we have no direct influence over. Now to a certain degree, your success will be within your control, but much of it comes down to how you react to the situations around you — control, yes, but of your response first and foremost. Recall the flexibility we spoke of earlier on, and how it pays to adjust your course depending on which direction the wind around you is blowing. This allows you to dedicate your time to more strategic thinking.
After all, success is as much about being able to enjoy the fruits of your labor as it is about the particular achievements. There is a huge difference between being busy and being productive and you should not confuse one with the other. Your unconscious mind will always be working, so you can relax your conscious mind and experience the moments in life that can only be found in family, friends, nature, and recreation.
One almost universal requirement of success is the willingness to dive into an unknown future and embrace it. The alternative is to keep to your comfort zone and never grow beyond it. Simply by stepping beyond your usual bubble, you will encounter things that will test you and reward you in equal measure.
Fear is natural and fear is good; it keeps you on your toes and prepares you for the unexpected. Growth towards success will invariably lead you down new and novel paths, so accept your fear, but do not let it stop you from taking a leap into the unknown. When we put off till tomorrow what we can do today, we refuse to acknowledge the opportunity that today brings.
Strictly speaking, tomorrow is an imaginary time because it can only be experienced in your mind; as soon as tomorrow comes, it is no longer tomorrow at all.
To this end, you ought to look at what you can do today that might contribute to your future success. This means no procrastination, no laziness, no distractions. Do it now. At this point in time, there is a major risk to your continued success from a complacent attitude. Chances are, if you spend two hours a day there, you'll be healthier.
According to Quora user Kane Harry, failure is a crucial step towards success. Anyone who hasn't succeeded probably hasn't failed enough. Because only when you fail can you get the lesson for yourself, like steel [that] has been beaten through the red fire, and you are able to cope with life full of sharper swords than you. By failing again and again, you'll sharpen your skills and your wits, leading you to make the right decisions the next time you're faced with a challenge.
Quora user Hector Quintanilla used an example from one of the most successful businessmen of all time, Walt Disney, to illustrate his point :. He was fired because his editor felt he ' lacked imagination and had no good ideas. Even though they were popular, by , his studio was drowning in debt, and Disney was forced to declare bankruptcy.
It took Disney nearly 20 years to succeed. Because there are no shortcuts! Walt Disney would go on to be synonymous with children's entertainment, and his once-bankrupt company is now the fourth-richest media company in the world.
Quora user Zeeshan Ul Islam says that there shouldn't be so much pressure on finding success at a young age. It takes some people decades:. It is because the situations are very different for both individuals. Some CEOs don't become successful until they're well into their later years. Failure is frightening. Losing your savings on a failed business is doubly frightening. Quora user Adam Fayed has some advice on losses :. Most people want success, but they want it without the risks and sacrifices involved.
Most people find losses and declines more hurtful than gains are pleasurable, so are more concerned with 'not losing' than winning. Not many people would take a commission-only job, for example, even if they are 21 and have nothing to lose.
Most people are petrified of losses with investments, and so just put the money in the bank, even though that is a long-term losing strategy. Quora user Elaine Sihera says that it's important to be hard on yourself, but don't focus on your mistakes to the point where they keep you from acting.
She writes:. But we are hampered by a fear of the consequences, a fear of taking risks, of creating opportunities and even a fear of handling success. In fact, some people's low opinion of themselves is so deep-rooted, and their resistance to change so strong, it would probably take years to show them that they are unique, talented human beings who can control their own future to great personal satisfaction. Sometimes, when pursuing our goals, we look too closely at the details and forget the big picture. Quora user Elizabeth Morrow has advice for anyone in this situation:. Is it still something that you're interested in?
It's not unusual for a goal to need tweaks, or even be changed entirely. As time passes, we all change. We learn more about ourselves, more about opportunities out there, and become more realistic about our wants. This doesn't mean that your first goal was poorly chosen. It only underscores how much you've grown. So, sit back, reassess what you want, and set a new goal. She also said that if you haven't met your goal yet, it doesn't necessarily mean you've failed yet. But if you look at your goal and realize that it's unrealistic, set a new one.
Quora user Zeeshan Ul Islam says there is a law of incubation for success. A chicken's egg hatches in 21 days, whereas a human fetus has roughly a nine-month gestation period. However, a human can be much more useful and impactful to society than a chicken. Incubation is the law of nature.
Learn the best ways to manage stress and negativity in your life. People who possess this mental strength see challenges as opportunities. But is it really? Latest on Entrepreneur. For me: I want to be honest with the people around me.
Great things take time. Impossible takes a little longer. Zeeshan is saying that great things take time, and greater things take longer.